(The following was written in September 2007, as I sat down to begin writing the book I had already outlined in my mind on how to maximize impact in affecting positive change.)
In preparation for writing, I sat down and gazed at a beautiful statue of the mother goddess sitting on her lotus throne, being honored as she eminated love wisdom for all. I desired my writing be guided by this wisdom and asked she be with me as I prepared myself to write. I started to form a question, something along the lines of “What do you want for us,” or “How do you instruct that we carry out our impact in the world?” I don’t think I actually got the question fully formulated as the ideas for the outline of the book turned to mush and tears started welling up in my eyes. All of the stress and tension and pressures in my body started to release as I invoked the divine spirit of grace. Energy began flowing through my body, and my neck began rolling and stretching. All too easily I slipped into the familiar state of surrender and allowed spirit to move my neck to stretch it where it most needed it. My tears didn’t hold back . . . they gushed over the dams of my eyes and I just released. . . letting go of the tensions of the day and the pressures I had put on myself to write, the deadline fastly approaching and no headway yet made. I let all of this go in the moment and allowed myself to receive from the all-knowing, all-loving source of all being. I was being given exactly what I needed most from our lovely divine mother.
I stood up and moved and found myself slowly approaching the window which overlooks the river. I stood there and found myself bending and twisting slowly and methodically, spirit loosening my back and hips, stretching the tightness in my legs, still lingering from the workout at the gym with my sister.
I continued to cry as I felt the gentle energy work silently, knowingly, caring for my body and moving energy where it was needed most for healing and relaxation. I cried into every stretch. I stood tall and rolled my head around, my hair brushing across my cheeks. The tears rolled down my neck and seemed to be cleansing and cooling.
I watched the trees out the window. . . their stationary nature . . . their branches giving in to the whims of the wind, while the trunks were frimly rooted in the earth where they stood.
I let go of my attachments to outcomes and what I had felt I needed to accomplish with this time I had allocated for writing. I recognized that my state of being was so much more important to establish before I attempted to write or do anything. If I were to give this gift, I needed to first be able to receive it myself.
While I might talk a good talk about “being” before “doing,” I was being led to experience this. And I was being instructed without words, as I allowed spirit to move energy through me. . . to prepare the state of my body to be a relaxed, open vessel, ready to receive. Spirit knew, better than I did, the block that the stress and tension in my body would cause in disallowing pure inspiration to flow through.
I was being shown that I needed to be in a state of being filled up before I could overflow love to anyone else. And so I humbly received my lesson and teaching . . . not through words I was directed to write on paper, but through my body’s actual experience.
I was simultaneously receiving a blessing of pure love energy. Funny that she is always there to us. I felt my body so starved for this deep, rich, unconditional love energy that is entirely healing, entirely soothing, entirely nurturing.
I have a great deal further to go in filling myself up with love if I expect to ve able to overflow it to everyone I meet . . . if I expect to overflow it in my writing of this book. But while I believe there’s a lot of filling up that needs to take place, I am suspicious that it can happen nearly in an instant. I don’t think “getting filled up” has to be a long and arduous and slow task. It is simply a matter of how willing I am to open, how wide of a stream I am willing to receive.
After a bit of stretching and crying, I felt a headache emerging. I had tried to allow the tears to flow instead of creating tension in my forehead, hoping to avoid the headache. My stretching was a little less delicious than it sometimes is and I could feel myself growing restless.
I found myself turning and making methodical steps toward the sofa. How nice to just lay down . .. . But no, I wanted to stay with the process and the spirit and go where it took me. I moved right in front of the couch and turned and sat.
The pillow beckoned me lay down to rest on mother’s breast. And there I was cradled. She held me as I lay curled in a ball. I felt helpless as a baby as I surrendered my body completely to melt into this rich, nurturing, sustaining lap. She held me close and stroked my hair.
There, there sweet one. Mother is here. Just relax as I love you. You really torture yourself far too much. This is not my wish for you. She spoke with grace and a soft smile on her presence.
You want to fix everything that you see wrong in the world. But that is not expected of you dear one. You take on too much. And it causes a stress and tension in you which produces the opposite affects from that which you desire.
The earth/mother does not need you to fix all of her “problems,” even if you imagine you and your kind have created them or are somehow responsible for them. She is much more capable than you at fixing or adjusting that which is ready to be brought back into balance.
Your struggle and strife to fix, while well-intentioned, is not what you are here for. It is not the greatest gift you have to give. It has potential for impact, but only a dim flicker compared to the blaze the world desires to see from you.
You are here to realize the greatest gifts you were assigned to bring to the world. That gift which is your own unique divine genius. The source of this divine genius is pure love.
You are not expected to ‘save’ the whole world or worry about how to do so. The world is changing very rapidly and dramatically. You would do best to relax and allow and flow with it.
There will be so much out of your control. . . just breathe through it and watch how swiftly things happen. It is truly magnificent. . . the performance the world is performing now.
It may feel uncomfortable at times as places are erupted and old structures shed. It is like a woman’s monthly cycle. Every month she sheds the rich lining provided to nurture life. . . she sheds it. . . it erupts violently and a woman feels this in her body . . . the cramping and tension as the entire inside of her womb erupts and overflows in a rich red lava. And this is necessary in order for a fresh, rich lining to be formed for a new egg, a new seed to have a chance to take root.
And yet, a woman does not need to plan how to do it. . . how to prepare her womb to nourish a new seedling. She does not need to take action, or plan or stress. And even if she did, the cycle would continue, because it is the doing of nature.
And so it is with the earth herself. She knows what is necessary to continue to nurture life. She may erupt in ways that feel violent and painful, but she is doing what is necessary to continue to foster the birth of the new.
This will play out energetically and you will physically witness signs of it with your senses, just as you see the wind through the trees, you will see spirit working through your systems and structures. . . your governments, religions, economies, businesses, communities.
You can ‘do’ something if you desire, but know that the shift occurring will happen irregardless of you. While you believe YOU are impacting IT. . . the world reality, consciousness, IT is impacting YOU!
You will be brought to know all you need to know. You will be given all the resources you need. You will evolve at a fascinating rate. This is already happening as we speak. And it is not necessary for you to control it or guide it. It is happening to you, through you. The more you open to it, the more spirit will use you as an instrument to carry out the glorious master plan . . . the glorious masterpiece.
Every one of you has a role to play . .. the world has everything she needs in every one of you. Every gift that is needed in the recipe for this grand evolution has been created. You are all amazing creations who were created with a unique way you were meant to contribute.
We smile because you get in your own way! But you are learning; we are moving through you and we are growing together. Isn’t it exciting? Isn’t it luscious?
You need only recognize the light that burns brightly within you and remove any obstacles that prevent it from shining. The brighter you shine your own gift, your own divine genius, the more you soften the barriers and allow others to shine their light. This is how you change the world. This is how you shift consciousness and evolve the state of the world. This is how it is done.
It is really quite simple isn’t it?
So relax my child here in my arms. Relax now and let me hold you and soothe you. We’ll rest. There’s plenty of time. No rush. The world will not end because you have relaxed into love for a moment. Instead it will ease her experience and you will enjoy each other. And the world will evolve as she has intends.
